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parenting is always bringing new surprises. just because you've had a kid, doesn't make you an expert. and i've learned this week that just because you've had 3 kids, certainly doesn't make you a superior, know-it-all parent.

now that none of us are at the apex of our colds (thank god), we still have had a few setbacks. bryn had a bad case of diarrhea which led to a REALLY bad case of diaper rash. she was in so much pain she would shriek and scream every time she peed. luckily, i'm still on maternity leave so i was able to whisk her to the doctor where they made sure she didn't have a urinary tract infection. there she cried herself to sleep (at which point i was able to cry and let down my "it's ok baby, mommy's got this" guard). if you know bryn, you'll know she's super tough when it comes to pain. she'll fall at the park and dust herself off. she'll get 2 shots in a row and not shed a tear. so, i knew she was hurting when she was wailing this time around. fortunately, we got her the creams she needed and the probiotics for her intestines and is on the mend.

but then, the very next day, i was clipping cooper's nails (perhaps a bit too nonchalantly). i thought i was a pro at nail clipping. 2 kids down and no bleeding yet. but then... he started shrieking.. and then the blood.... i felt SO awful. it's one awful thing to have a sick/hurt/injured child. it's wholly another thing to be the one who inflicted their pain. UGH. i still shudder at the thought of what i did and can't look at his thumb without choking back tears.

last night, it was bailey's turn. i know i jinxed us when i commented earlier in the week, "you know it's funny. bailey has never had diarrhea." sure enough, bam. fingers crossed she kicks her stomach bug quickly.

perhaps all the guilt and crying is a result of post-pregnancy hormones. but any way you cut it, parenting is bitch. curve balls guaranteed daily.

but this article helped and rang true.